The emotionlal struggle to life and happiness
What’s happening in your life?
How can I make the transformation for being content when I’m not able to write down what it will take to make me happier? And what is happy? At least I’m asking myself the question.
Once again I was reminded that when you pass there is no U Haul and what you accumulate could very well be someone else’s obligation to get rid of. My husband just recently had to sell or give away over 100 years of possessions his Aunt had. In essence there was nothing anyone wanted. A sign of what is really important in life to you and your family.The exception, if I were leaving a sports car or fancy toys I’m sure there would be interest, however, the day to day things usually are only important to the person with the memories.
And there we are again, it’s the memories you often have that fuel your existence. The treasures are usually kept in boxes in cupboards or drawers and rarely looked at. Why do we keep them? In our minds could this be what we think is our happiness?
So starting this weekend, I’ve promised my husband I will look in our storage areas, and begin the process of getting rid of things which have been stored away for years.
I do suggest you speak with your children, friends and family to make sure one of them doesn’t want to keep what you’re considering giving to the Salvation Army or throwing away. However, once you’ve done that make the plunge and get on with your life. I’m thinking it’s the first step to my figuring out what’s really up in my mind.
By the way, please think about this site…it’s a grandma site where my family and friends are sharing our life and experiences hoping it can help you with yours. After 62 years of living I’ve pretty much seen a lot. I won’t give advice; however, I can share what I know or what I’ve done and the consequences. You ultimately have to decide for yourself. I’m willing to give my opinion, and that would be based on choices I’ve made and how it affected my life. I also believe that by sharing your comments we all make a difference to each other. Looking at our past, we should be able to improve our future… (Do you think)?
Hopefully this weekend I’ll be more specific. It’s my first full week back to work and it’s been great. I feel normal again. My strength is building and I know I’m healed from Cancer. Thank you again, for your loyalty to this site. While I’ve been sick, tired and now pondering my life. I love you guys…
Dorothy
12 Responses to “The emotionlal struggle to life and happiness”
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I learned when I left my husband 10 years ago that it’s all just “stuff” and that the only stuff that matters is the state of your heart, the state of your mind and the state of your soul; material stuff doesn’t matter.
Now my “dissolving stuff” came as a surprise. We had a much needed garage sale and I found my self carrying out my Lighthouse and Birdhouse Collection. I bought a lot of them myself but a lot were given to me by friends. While I dusted each one, I thought about who gave it to me. I couldn’t remember. It then just became “stuff” that my husband would have to get rid of. So I started on my Angel shelf. Here I had been smarter. I had put initials on the bottom of each angel. Whoops, whose initials are JT? More Stuff. I did keep a few if I remembered who gave them to me. BUT even though I sold most of the bird houses and lighthouses, I didn’t price the angels. Whenever someone admired one and questioned the price, it was wrapped and given to them no charge. Perhaps it was the cancer that told me “stuff” is not important – happiness is and boy did it make me feel good to give my angels a good home.
We’re in the process of going through my grandmother’s house and I’ve decided that all I really care about is the things that remind me the most of her and my times with her. Many of them have very little monetary value but a whole lot of nostalgic significance. Great post.
Ashley, thank you….and I feel I’m on the right track..with my thoughts. Your words are helping me put things in their right place.
Mary Lou, what a wonderful way to give your angels a new home…I’m going to remember that when I help my sister with her garage sale.
I know the cancer told me stuff is not important..because for two months I couldn’t think of anything except getting through the surgery and it’s affects. If my house crumbled around me and my family and I survived, I had won the lottery…
Kay your right its the memories and I’m so glad I elected to go through this trauma of thought. I’ll keep you guys posted as I lament my life..
Thanks so much for helping and encouraging me that my words are on the right track…
Dorothy
oh the stuff of life, it accumulates quicker than I can move it along. I do love my books, they can stay awhile. Congrats on your going back to work. Hope you have a happy Friday!
Awesome site. I have to say that I really enjoyed visiting. A different and refreshing perspective on things. Thanks so much for stopping by and making yourself known. I’ll be visiting very often now.
I just found your blog and sure have enjoyed your insight. I too am a grandma of 4 and love being grandma. My husband and I are now raising our 3 year old and almost 2 year old grandchildren. I recently started my own blog but am new to the blogging world.
When I went through a divorce 9 years ago, I lost everything except a few personal things. I didn’t care at the time because I was happy to just get out of that alive. So, I started all over again and I learned in going through all that, that those were just material things. For the first time, I was really happy. I was a single mom and new to the outside work world so I didn’t make much money. Before this I had been a stay at home mom to my five kids and did daycare so I could stay home. We lived very simple and yes, sometimes it was very hard but we were happy.
I remarried 2 years ago to a most wonderful man. Even though I have more “things” or luxerys now then I did then, I am no more happy…just happy to be with my husband and to have good relationships with my kids and grandchildren. Even though I am going through some tough times right now, I am still happy, because the happiness I have comes from within.
I will be back often to visit your blog!
Hey, Congrats on getting back to work full time…!!! Well… I too have the habit to keeping keep sakes for all the times that I have had. Be it movie ticket stubs..or even food bill. Its very hard to let go. You look at a thing read a journal..see a peice of cloth and are reminded of those good ol days. But, sometimes you have to let go. Change is a part of life, and its the hardest thing to do. Ironically change is the thing that can make you leave a troubled past behind… and let you embrace the new challenges that may make you happy. You learn from mistakes of past…but there is no point dwelling on it. I learned that finally. And I also learned that to have a happy day you need to wake up smiling… later you can scowl if things dont go your way… till then CHEERS…!!!
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That’s great you’re back to work! I’m so glad you’re feeling so well.
I agree…it’s a good idea to clean out periodically. When my mother moved out of the house I grew up in, two years ago, there was tons of stuff I didn’t even know she had kept. Me being the sentimentalist that I am, I ended up with about 6 large cartons of memorabilia that I couldn’t bear to throw away and she had no room for in her studio apartment. Now I am envying her the more uncluttered existence she has in the apartment while my basement is full of boxes! And I don’t even have kids to pass the stuff on to!
Girl, I hope you drank one for me (vodka and tonic)….lol
Another great post! Holding on to “things” has always been one of my weaknesses. I was going through some things in storage last week and actually found clothing from my Jr. High days! Although it was exciting to note they actually fit after all these years, honestly, most of them really wouldn’t be considered appropriate for a 51 yr. old Granny to be wearing around town! LOL
So glad you’re feeling better,and regaining strength to the point you are able to go back to work!
Thank you so much for visiting my blog, and for the great comment! Love your blog, and with your permission, would like to add you to my blog roll. That way I can see when you’ve updated and will be reminded to stop by here more often